The bean thief (no, it isn’t a joke!)

It happened for the first time early on. We had our first flush of the first-planted Jackson Lima beans. The Jacksons were also planted front and center in the front garden. “Tomorrow we’re going to have a main course of lima beans,” I crowed. Yet, when I went out to gather them the next day…there was not a single bean pod of any size or readiness on any of the plants. I really didn’t know what to think.

About a week later, when the Henderson Lima’s were just ready to pick –branches hanging heavy with bean pods just hours away from being ready for picking, abracadabra from evening to next morning and they almost all disappeared, save for a few that were hanging way deep in the branches.

All during the time when harvesting needed to happen in the pouring rain, I collected big bowl fulls of string beans, lima beans, and runner beans.

Yesterday we took a tour of the garden and debated collecting the copious numbers of runner, string, and lima beans that were ready for harvesting but could go another day and decided against taking them then, as dinner was already planned and things taste best when harvested within a few hours of munching down on them. There were so many that I was not only planning to harvest them for dinner but also to do a canning batch today.

I should have harvested and consigned them to the fridge. ALL of the runner beans were gone today. After much rooting about, I managed to find only 9 string beans. The lima beans… meh, only those that won’t be ready for another 3 days and the ones on the ‘seed’ plants that are already in nearly dried state were left.

It is a two-legged critter that we more than suspect.

She is renting out a space in our neighbour’s house and comes over almost daily to borrow everything from garlic to envelopes, lemon, string, ice (a lot of ice, as it seems she has a mini-fridge that doesn’t have a freezer), and about anything else you can imagine. She also has commented extensively on our garden, noting what seems to be ‘just about ready’ (namely the beans) and the progress of our eggplants, peppers and tomatoes –only she (frankly, thankfully) doesn’t realize that the majority of tomatoes we are growing never turn red when ripe, that the aubergines should be harvested at only 4 inches long and skinny, and that the peppers we are growing don’t conform to your standard green bell pepper.

From this time last night to now, we are missing about 300 bean pods containing 3-5 beans per pod…

5 responses to “The bean thief (no, it isn’t a joke!)”

  1. Coyote says :

    Maybe a web cam to catch the bean thief?

  2. tddpirate says :

    How about biological war?
    Ideas (DISCLAIMER: DO NOT TAKE THEM SERIOUSLY!):
    – Spray some harmless but foul tasting liquid on the beans.
    – Glue so the beans stick to the two-legged critter’s skin.
    – Color to dirty her skin and colors.
    – Cover with some laxative material.
    – Put up a warning notice that the beans were sprayed by some horrible poison against vermin (without actually spraying them).

  3. Erin says :

    Wow. I’m kinda speechless…I mean who does that?!?!?!

  4. dumbledoresarmy says :

    That is disgusting. Totally disgusting. The thing is: think of the money value of the food; she is robbing you blind, and you do not have much to spare. She is stealing form you just as blatantly as if she were going round your kitchen when you were out, taking stuff off the shelves. Can you borrow a nice big dog from someone, to guard your garden for the duration of the bean season? Or booby-trap the garden patch somehow?

  5. israeliminx says :

    Pretty incredible, isn’t it?! We’ve started taking the peppers before they get full-sized, the tomatoes before they are fully ripe (and let them ripen the rest of the way in the cabinet) and the beans when the pods are still in beans-not-formed state and are using them in stir fries (the whole pod) instead of as lima beans just to make sure that they don’t get stolen again and that we can eat them. I sat down and figured it out and and all in all about $50 worth of beans went missing if you bought that amount of them at the price that their organic counterparts sell for at the grocery!

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